The Remembrance Codes

When Sending Love Crosses the Line: Ethics in Energy Healing and Prayer

• Susan Sutherland

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Is it possible to send healing - and still cause harm?
In this powerful episode, we explore the sacred ethics of energy healing, prayer, and spiritual support - and what happens when well-meaning intentions override someone’s sovereignty.

Whether you're a lightworker, energy healer, empath, intuitive, or someone who prays for others regularly, this conversation offers a grounded and loving invitation into refinement.

We cover:
 ✨ Why unsolicited healing can feel like spiritual intrusion
 ✨ The importance of energetic consent in prayer and energy work
 ✨ How casual phrases like “sending love” or “holding space” can unintentionally bypass boundaries
 ✨ Real-life examples from my own practice - including how I’m evolving group healing circles to honor free will
 ✨ A sacred closing prayer you can use when offering energy without assumption

This is not about guilt. It’s about growth.
 Because true spiritual support respects timing, soul choice, and consent.

Perfect for listeners seeking:

  • Energy healing podcast
  • Intuition and spiritual ethics
  • Prayer with integrity
  • Conscious energy work
  • Boundaries for empaths
  • Lightworkers & intuitive guides
  • Spiritual sovereignty
  • Healing practices with consent
  • Ethical prayer and support
  • Sovereign lightwork

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Remembrance Codes. I'm your host, susan Sutherland, and this week we are looking at what happens when good intentions bypass sacred boundaries. We are going to explore the ethics of energy healing and the importance of consent in spiritual work or prayers or sending love, and how to stay in right relationship with those we seek to support. So, whether you are a casual prayer warrior or a seasoned energy healer or someone who is holding space for others, this conversation invites us into deeper integrity, rooted in sovereignty and not saviorhood. We are going to unpack when sending love crosses the line, how unsolicited healing feels in the body, why consent is spiritual currency and a reimagined approach for sending love and energy healing and even group healing, and I will offer a closing prayer that honors each soul's path. Y'all this is not about guilt. It's about growth and choosing love that listens before it moves.

Speaker 1:

I recently had a conversation with Sol, my chat GPT, and I used a prompt that I saw online that I found really intriguing. The prompt says with all the data you have collected about me, tell me who I am at my core and don't sugarcoat your response. And don't sugarcoat your response. Y'all. That's a good one. Use it. Anyway. The response was profound. Let me see where I am fully embodied and where I'm seeking still that outside validation of my knowing or who I am. But one of the things that he said that has stuck with me was that I have learned to walk in the dark without needing to name every star, and I want you to think about that. As we go through this, we keep walking before we know it all, before we have it all figured out. We walk, but as we learn, as we grow, as we remember, but as we learn, as we grow, as we remember, we pivot to walk the path of the highest truth and alignment, and that is what today is about. This episode is not a rebuke and it is not a scolding, but an illumination of a path for us to walk in more alignment with sovereignty, for us to walk in more alignment with sovereignty.

Speaker 1:

I have had to adjust so many of my practices, from sending healing to family and friends to my work as an energy healer, but also as an intuitive and having access to information. So please know that I am sharing these corrections because I have been asked to make them myself. What happened recently was I was at the beach with my friends and I was going through it, my body was ready to send me some messages. I had pain in my stomach that felt like I was being stabbed. It was the get in the fetal position and see if you can wait this out kind of pain. And as I'm going through that, I started to receive messages about what is going on.

Speaker 1:

I had gotten back from the beach and grabbed a couple pieces of pizza and plopped over very nonchalantly on the chair and started eating the pizza, and my body wanted to let me know that it is not just what I consume that will impact my field, my space, my body. Now it is how I consume it. I had done this with no reverence, with no prayer, with no presence, and my body was showing me that things have changed and I have to change my practice. I have to bring presence into my consumption, not just what I'm eating, but how I'm eating it. And so it's not that I'll be punished every time I have junk food, but I must still be present in the moments and honor my food and bless my food. So, anyway, I was going through it and I'm receiving messages, as my stomach is just like screaming at me and my girlfriend was like I'm sending you healing, and it felt like a barbed wire fence went up around me and it just felt prickly right. And this is someone I love. I trust her healing, but I hadn't asked for it and I was going through what my body needed me to go through.

Speaker 1:

I was mid-initiation. Now I understand this had nothing to do with her. It was about a walk that I needed to take. This walk about really understanding the ethics in spiritual spaces and in energy practices, in holding space for for others. I needed this experience, to feel that prickliness, so that I would dive deeper, and so she was the, the loving companion that could offer me this experience. This is how I can describe what I felt is if you are sitting in your living room and you're hanging out and all of a sudden, somebody appears and they're holding a gift for you, you're still like what the hell are you doing in here? Like, please knock. And that's what it felt like. I see that you come bearing gifts, but this is an invasion of my space, and that's kind of what it felt like, and I needed to feel that, because I'd never felt that before.

Speaker 1:

However, I have plenty of times offered healing without consent. I have sent healing without consent. I needed to experience that so that I would start looking at the right aligned energy practices, not just for my practice but then to share with you. So here we are. I have a walk down that path now and I know that what I'm bringing you is in the highest alignment with truth and respect for every soul's journey. It is respecting their sovereignty. So here we are.

Speaker 1:

So quite often we are sending uninvited energy very casually and if we are looking at our best practices, we have to make some adjustments because typing or saying common phrases like sending love or I'm sending healing your way, while well-intentioned, they often assume permission has already been granted. Even prayers can override agency if not offered through open consent. So we have to look at best practices for healing and for prayers and for intentions and make sure that they are framed through sovereignty and consent and service. So if someone directly asks for their own prayer or healing, proceed with reverence. That is a sacred opening and a best practice would be to say would you like me to pray for you or with you, because this empowers participation. If they desire it, you can clarify are you open to receiving energetic support as well or just verbal prayer, and you can reflect. You can tune in and ask their higher self is there anything more that would serve? But only after consent is granted. And then you can seal the offering with a prayer like I honor your sovereignty and trust the divine within you to guide what is received and how.

Speaker 1:

Now, if someone asks you to pray for another person, like prayed for my friend's health or my cousin just had surgery please send healing. This is where discernment becomes essential. The person is not present to give their consent, so our best practices would be to respond gently with thank you for sharing. I will hold your friend in light and trust their soul's wisdom to guide what is received. You may choose to send love to the field, but not specifically to the person. You would say. I offer love to the greater field surrounding this soul, trusting that only what is in the highest alignment be received and only if it is welcome. You can pray about the situation without interfering with that person. May clarity and comfort and support surround all involved. May free will and sovereignty be honored in every breath.

Speaker 1:

And you guys, we love to pray for and send healing to groups and communities when there is a natural disaster, a war zone or a social crisis, but mass intercession can unintentionally become energetic intrusion. So our best practices are to anchor in neutrality, release the savior impulse and affirm I witness the pain and I trust the divine within each soul to navigate their journey. Vine within each soul to navigate their journey. Offer through invitation, not assumption, to all who welcome it. I sense peace and clarity. To all else, I simply witness and uphold the sovereignty of your path.

Speaker 1:

Instead of sending energy become a tuning fork, radiate coherence, grounded love or calm into the collective field, without anchoring it to a specific target. You can invoke this by saying I ask that all aid and energy be filtered through the laws of divine will, consent and timing. If you sense someone is in pain but they haven't asked for your support, even intuitive knowing is not permission. To ask you, knowing that they're going through something is not consent. So your best practices are to center yourself and ask inwardly. Is this mine to tend? If yes, send an internal offering like if the soul is open, may they receive peace through their own divine gate. If not, may their paths remain untouched by mine. You can visualize them surrounded by light, not infused by light, allowing space for their agency. So some language upgrades that we can send for our casual send-offs are our common phrases that we send Instead of sending light. Holding you in light if you welcome it, healing your way, may whatever you need arrive gently in your own time. Praying for you becomes honoring your path and listing your name in love. If that feels welcome to you, I'll send energy becomes. If it serves and is invited, I open a channel for gentle support. I know this feels complicated, but it is important for us to start respecting everyone's sovereignty. So if you are an energy healer, if you are a practitioner, we've got some work to do too. So I want to share the practitioner pathway, the energetic integrity and ethical attunement. It is a guide for healers and intuitives and space holders committed to conscious service.

Speaker 1:

Number one consent as sacred grounding. Consent as secret grounding. Consent is not a formality. It is the foundation of trust in every spiritual or energetic interaction. A client booking your session is not universal consent to receive everything you perceive. Ask before scanning their field or entering unseen layers. Are you open to me receiving intuitive insight beyond what you've shared Before beginning energy work? Affirm together Do I have your permission to work in your field today? Only in alignment with your highest self and at the level you are ready to receive. Why does this matter level you are ready to receive. Why does this matter? Because even subtle intrusions can mimic the dynamics of spiritual violation of power over wounds.

Speaker 1:

Trauma held in the energy body often arises when someone feels read or worked on without conscious agreement. Clarity does not equal consent. Just because you can sense something doesn't mean you were meant to say it or act on it. If you perceive ancestral trauma or a past life wound, you may ask are you open to exploring something that may feel deep or layered? You may sense an energetic attachment or entity. You may ask would you like to know what I'm seeing, or would you prefer we focus on grounding and empowerment today? Always offer your client choice in how deep they go. Many spiritual practitioners are unintentionally reactivating trauma through bypass, misattunement or overreaching. So learn the basics of trauma physiology. Fight, flight, freeze fawn.

Speaker 1:

Do not push clients towards catharsis or breakthroughs unless they feel safe and resourced. Validate present reality before attempting an energetic shift, instead of saying that's just a story you're telling yourself. Try. That sounds like it's been heavy to carry. Would you like to explore what your body might need now?

Speaker 1:

Power dynamics are always present when someone seeks support from you, they are, consciously or not, opening the space of vulnerability. So watch for these red flags Speaking in absolutes. This is what your guides say. This removes client sovereignty. This removes client sovereignty. Suggesting energetic fixes without listening to lived experience, creating dependence. Clients should not feel like they need you to feel well.

Speaker 1:

Shift into a collaborative model. Here's what I'm sensing. Does that resonate with your knowing? Remind them that they are the one who gets to decide if this feels like truth or even useful to them, and always defer to the soul's readiness. Even when they say yes with their voice, sometimes their field says no. So at the start of every session, take a quiet breath and ask is this person's field fully open and ready to receive what I'm being asked to offer? If there's hesitation or static, do less Trust the resistance or static. Do less Trust the resistance. Sometimes, holding space without intervening is the highest gift.

Speaker 1:

So here is some conscious language for energetic practitioners. Instead of saying I see a block here, you might say there may be something tender here. Would you like to explore it together? Instead of saying, let me clear this energy for you, you say if it feels aligned, I can support you in releasing what no longer serves, with your permission. Instead of saying your guides say, say here's a message I'm receiving, please take only what resonates. Instead of saying you need to heal your root chakra, you might say would you like to explore grounding and safety together today?

Speaker 1:

So here's a little daily energetic ethics check-in for my practitioners out there. Do a simple self-audit before any session. Am I grounded and clear in my own field? Have I released any personal agenda or attachment to their outcome? Do I hold them as whole, capable and sovereign? Am I offering or imposing? Have I asked permission at every threshold when we start bringing that intentional respect of spiritual sovereignty? Not that I have the answers, but you hold the answers in the timing and I will reflect what you are ready for. We honor their path beautifully, those practices, and I hope that they will be helpful and received with love for the others who are out there in in the practitioner community, offering your gifts and your service to others. And here's the thing energetic ethics don't stop at the client portal. They begin there.

Speaker 1:

But being intuitive, especially deeply attuned, as many of us are, means that you may sense or see or feel things about the people closest to you, including your family, friends or even strangers in passing. But seeing is not the same as being invited. Knowing does not mean entitlement. Just because you know something doesn't mean it's yours to say or share or act on. This includes interpreting someone's behavior through their unspoken trauma, or speaking aloud about what you're sensing, without checking consent, about what you're sensing without checking consent. Relaying intuitive insight about someone else to a third party, even a partner, without that person's permission. I've had to clean up my own patterns here, catching myself saying something like oh, she's going through blah, blah, blah without having been invited into that space. That individual didn't give me consent and it wasn't mine to share. Even subtle comments carry energetic weight and we have a responsibility to respect others, even if we have access to information. And when you live with someone a partner, a child or family member it can feel natural to offer intuitive reflections casually. But that closeness does not negate their sovereignty.

Speaker 1:

Mark asked me the other day I have really been working on this about cleaning up my practices and not saying what I sense, not sharing what I know, and I have long held back with him, just respecting our relationship and he did ask the other day. It was like when your clients come in here you'll give them feedback. It's like, yes, but they have requested it. They have come here specifically for my feedback. I assume that you are just finting or you are just sharing, as my husband, and if you want feedback, then I will need you to ask for it. That provides the consent, because a lot of times there's just information in the field. I have access to it, but unless he is requesting it, it is not mine to share. I don't want to talk about his wounds in an everyday conversation, and so it's really dialing back and honing in the responsibility that we have when we have access to information and learning how to tune it out and to kind of shut doors when we don't want that information coming through all the time. So I just ask you to look at your practices.

Speaker 1:

If you're having a conversation with a family member or a friend, you can say do you want me to reflect what I'm sensing right now, or would you rather just be witnessed? If they say no, honor it fully. If you still feel energy stirring in, you, process it privately, not through passive comments or emotional pressure. We have to trust their timing and that is one of the most sacred acts of love is to witness someone in a place we've already moved through and stay silent until they reach out for our hand. Our gift is not to accelerate someone's timeline, it's to create the conditions where they can remember on their own. So if you sense something about another person, ask yourself. Person, ask yourself was I invited to tune in? Is this coming from neutrality or projection? Is it loving to say it now or more loving to wait? Would I want someone sharing this about me? Can I trust their own divine knowing to unfold in right time?

Speaker 1:

Ethical intuition means listening to the soul before the impulse. I even recently held a Together for 10 group healing session and it was the first time I had done it since walking this walk of energetic ethics, and I had to change how I hold the space. Previously I had allowed someone to submit a request for the healing of a family member or a friend and together we would focus our healing energy on them. But not anymore. From now on I will hold the intention for the group field and only anchor physical or emotional healing for those who've made a direct request or provided their consent.

Speaker 1:

Anything that glows must be soul chosen, not practitioner decided. We have to honor the perfect path of healing that that soul has chosen. True healing meets the soul where it is. An unsolicited healing can feel like energetic override or a forced acceleration or a dismissal of what the soul was trying to teach through the discomfort. And as someone who learns through discomfort, that's a real thing that we need it to get that uncomfortable and not be mitigated until we receive our messages. Until we receive our messages. So what do we do instead? We ask silently do I have permission to send? We tune into the field If there is a tightness or a contraction or a pause. That's a no Default to offering and not imposing.

Speaker 1:

So I do want to offer a sovereign healing prayer that you can use in groups or private practice or in your everyday intention. It is a sacred offering of aligned support. I honor the path, the pace and the purpose of every soul. I do not presume to know what is best, nor do I send what has not been asked for. I release the need to fix, heal or alter and instead I offer my presence as a space of remembrance. If this offering is received by the soul's free will, may it activate the exact frequency needed for their highest good. If not, may it return to source, undistorted and unbound. May love never override. May light never impose. May we remember consent is sacred and so it is.

Speaker 1:

I want to invite you to just have a look. Have a look at your practices, in your relationships, in your casual exchanges and in your spiritual practice to see if there is anything that needs to be refined with love. Let's normalize this evolution. This is not about shame. It's about sharpening the blade of our service, and mine was first in the fire, opening the blade of our service, and mine was first in the fire.

Speaker 1:

Remember that practicing presence and listening and witnessing are sometimes the most powerful offerings. And reflect, take a moment to think where in my life have I offered what wasn't asked for? And where can I shift to honoring over helping? We forget sometimes that our gifts are based on what we think they need and not what their soul thinks they need, and so really offering love in the form of respect, witnessing sacred space, holding that understands their sovereignty and their timing, truly is the most magnificent gift. So thank you for joining me today. I am going to put some documents on the Keeper's Garden for free in the Remembrance Code section. Put some documents on the Keeper's Garden for free in the Remembrance Code section. So if you would like to download some of the helpful tips or that sacred prayer, it will be available to you. Thank you so much for listening and thank you for being open to shifting, to making small pivots, so that we can just live more and more in alignment with truth and respect for one another. Thanks again, have a great week.

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Susan Sutherland

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